Kaderique

by Martine Cadet

Kaderique is a Digital Content Management company that can help you take your brand into the digital world.  Martine Cadet is the founder and Creative Director of Kaderique.com Martine is based out of NJ and NYC.  Martine is a Media Influencer, Blogger, Speaker and Consultant.

Filtering by Category: life

5 Things I Learned While Dealing With the Sudden Death of My Father in Haiti

Today is Flag Day in Haiti. As a result every year, Haitians all over the world celebrate their culture and heritage. For the last 20 years of my life, it has not been a celebration for me at all. In fact, May 18 has been the worst calendar day for me.

I love my home country Haiti a lot. I love everything about it. But I realized that my bitter sweet love for being Haitian comes from the anger of the memory of what this country left me with.

It was December 30th 1996 when at 3 am I heard a huge knock on the door. My mother, my older sister and I were the only ones fast asleep in the house. My father was visiting my other sister in New York who was attending college at the time.

I woke up frantic. I ran to my mom and saw armed men in front. It was dark. These were the longest 20 minutes of my life. During the entire time, I was praying in my heart. Asking God to protect me, my sister and my mom. I blacked out. All I can remember are the tears falling down my face when one of the man approached me trying to slip his hands under my shirt. I begged him not to do me any arm. I told him to please not to do what he was attempting to do to me and I closed my eyes and prayed. God heard my prayers and one of the other man that was breaking everything in the house looking for money and any valuable things in the house to steal called him and he left me.

Complete silence... in the dark ... my mother, sister and I just started crying. Trying to understand what had just happened to us.

My father heard about what happened and was extremely upset. When he returned to Haiti from visiting my sister in New York, I hugged him and cried to him. He apologized to me and told me that this will never happen to me again. He made a promise to me that no one should ever hurt me.

It was May 15th 1997. 5 months later. 3 am in the middle of the night. I heard a huge knock. It was dark. A group of man with firearms walked into the house. My father, my mother, my sister and I all ran into my bedroom and locked the door. My father told me to jump over the window and just run. By the time I jumped over, a gun shot missed me. They had surrounded the house. I fell right on my back in the bedroom. We were not going to be able to escape. One of the man broke my bedroom door, pulled my mother and my father into the living room and asked them to lay flat...head down. It happened so fast.

At that point, I noticed that they had not seen my sister and I so I took my older sister's hand and ran into the bathroom to hide. I put my hand inside her mouth so she wouldn't scream. I peaked over the bathroom door and saw my parents legs and the men surrounding them with guns pointing at mom and dad. My heart was racing so fast. I didn't know what to do. I couldn't even make out what they were saying. And then I heard it. The gun shot. And then I saw it. The pool of blood. And then I heard it. My mother saying in creole "They shut Albert ...Jesus..They shut him..."

My Father Albert Frederique

Fast forward on May 18th 1997 , 1:00 am. My mother wakes me up at my aunt's house to tell me that my dad will not make it out of his coma and that he was gone forever.

It's OK to cry: Face it Again

After my father's sudden death, I was just numb. My only focus was to educate myself because learning was very important to him and I didn't want to disappoint him. I barely made it through high school. Landed in the States and only had one thing in mind: Make Him Proud.  I attended college full time while working a full time job. Giving up was never in my vocabulary.

I never cried. I never mourned. I did not want to. I was avoiding to cry. I was afraid to experience the pain. I tried to avoid any means possible not to travel to Haiti. When I did go, I went for no more than 3 days to family functions and back. This for over a decade until my husband did an intervention and booked a trip to Haiti and arranged for me to go back to the house and to visit my father in the cemetery. I cried for all the years that I never cried. I was 16 years old again fighting the anger that I had inside. My hands were sweating driving the streets of Haiti. Bringing back all of these memories was just like someone stabbing my heart with a sharp knife.

With my Father Albert Frederique in Africa

After that week long trip, I felt so good. I had released all of the tears I was holding on to for so long. I still cry today because I miss him so much. But my tears today are tears of joy. Tears of celebration of being his daughter.

It Doesn't Get Better Overtime

Friends and Family would tell me that it would get better overtime. It got worst. As I continued my life accomplishing huge milestones, I would cry even harder. Graduating from College, graduating from Grad school, getting married, giving birth, accepting a huge promotion at work....none of these events were easy for me.

I wanted to share them with him. Hear his thoughts. See him smile, cry, congratulate me, and walk me down the aisle.

The older I get the harder it gets. But today, I decided to switch my mindset and instead I choose to smile when I think of the things he would say to me when big moments in my life happen.

Who You Surround Yourself With is Vital

Put God first and the ones that love you and care for your well being most next.

I realized over the years that it is not about quantity but instead it is about the quality of the people around me that matters most. The vibration of the energy in the Universe does not lie.

When I decided to let God take control of my life, my circle of friends got very small and God edited down the people that were important to my growth and the ones that were not.

Today, as I continue to live this life, I am thankful and grateful for the new relationships that God has created for me and the ones that have stayed from day 1. Without them, I don't know that I would be able to have the strength nor the will to start a business, be a mom, a wife and work a full time job. Every time I feel like breaking down, I have someone texting me, emailing me or calling me without me even reaching out.

Surround yourself with the ones that care for you the most. Period.

You Will Feel Better When You Celebrate

When I reminisce about my father, I reminisce the good times. The moments when he made me laugh. The times that he thaught me something. When I celebrate him, I feel his spirit alive and I know that he is manifesting in everything that I do. I used to look at old pictures and cry. Now I smile and I can hear his voice when I see his pictures around the house and on my desk at work.

With my Father Albert Frederique

Stop Feeling Sorry For Yourself

What we feel is what we get. I used to want to associate all of my failures and obstacles because of what had happened to me in Haiti during those 2 nights.

I chose not to feel pity anymore and instead, God has thaught me that what happened in my life was needed for my personal growth and I accepted this rule. I no longer feel sorry for myself and I don't one anyone else to feel sorry for me.

My desk At work with pictures of my dad and kids

All and all, we all have a story deep inside that is untold. I chose to tell you mine in hopes to inspire you to conquer your pain and to put God first. The strength and passion that I have today is only because of what happened to me. I have accepted this and I am proud of it. I thank God for making me go through what I went though and building me up to be able to now publicly share my story.

Take your obstacles as blessings. I know it is hard to believe, but trust me, it is the best thing you could ever do for yourself. Today, I feel light, I feel stronger, I feel armed and ready to live my life to the fullest until I get to meet my daddy again and chat all about it.

Thank You Chrystelle Bouchereau, Vanessa Chery-Mellon, Dena Lancry, Elizabeth Memnon Desgrottes, Alexandra Outten, Allysha Canter, Daphne Valerius, Sherry Swan, Kara Vaval Ferrier for always checking up on me, sending me positive vibes and giving me that extra push when I don't even look for it.  Thank You to my husband, Fitzreynold Cadet for being patient with me in understanding what I went through and healing me.  Thank You to my kids, my sisters and my mom for always reminding me that I am here for a reason.  Thank You to my cousin, Fabienne Jean-Baptiste Leger and Cousin-in-law aka my BFF Vanessa Thezan Leger for always finding the time to connect no matter the distance. Thank You my Lord for giving me the strength to be able to type this post and finally express the core reason why I am heading the direction that I am heading because I chose to surrender to HIS love and obey.

I tend to look too close to the mirror sometimes and if it wasn't for these souls I would not have it in me to care about living after this tragedy. Today I am free and I am stronger.

Social Media Personal Life and Social Media Business Life: How To Balance Both?

Most people use social media for searching, not only socializing. I am pretty sure that if you do not have all social media platforms Apps that exist today on your phone, you at least have 1. I asked myself earlier this year and shared on one of my Facebook Live (video is at the end of the post) how important it is to balance your lives on social media.  Social Media is part of our daily life but you must know how to balance your personal and professional lives within it in my opinion to avoid social media peer pressure.

 

Without a doubt, joining social media platforms is the best way to connect with others.  Social media networking sites spread information faster than any other media. People use social media as a number one communication tool, but choosing the right channel is critical and it all depends on what you are looking to extract from it at the end of the day.

There is a huge difference between Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, LinkedIn etc....So, how do you use Social media platforms? To Decide which social media channel will best serve you, I've identified which platform that can integrate your personal life or your business life the best.

 

Facebook

  • Best Social Media Platform for your business

By far, Facebook is one of my favorite social media outlets because it helps you clearly separate your business from your personal life.  Earlier this year, I decided to keep my Facebook FanPage as my business Facebook page as it should be.  I used to share my Facebook Fanpage posts to my personal Facebook page to gain awareness in the beginning and decided to stop.  I figured if my connected Facebook friends are interested in my business brand, they will like and engage straight from my Facebook fan page. No need to double dip here and waste the energy on my side.

 

  • Best Social Media Platform for your personal life

That is only if you keep track of it.  What I mean by that is, you need to ensure that you connect with real people.  The last thing you want to happen to you is to be Facebook friends not so real friends. People you would generally not deal with on a regular basis.  I have taken the time to unfriend A LOT of people. I still have an entire list to go through. Just haven't been so active lately. In my opinion, Facebook should connect you with your family and closest friends. People you'd actually call or email directly at least once a year.

 

Pinterest

  • Best Social Media Platform for your business

I am so surprise when I meet small businesses and find out that they are not on Pinterest.  This is by far one of the best social media outlets that will give you the converted traffic that you need for your website  hands down.  As long as you do  it the right way that is. The part I like the most is that Pinterest is able to connect you with organic followers that are really interested in your niche.  It's really great!

 

  • Best Social Media Platform for your personal life

If you are creative, love to decorate, experience DIYs and more, there is no reason why you should not be on Pinterest. You can find so many ideas and create boards that you collaborate with others with pinned images that you like.  Pinterest to me is the visual Google social media platform for all things creative and inspirational.

 

Twitter

  • Best Social Media Platform for your business

Twitter is not dead.  If you are in business, I would strongly suggest that you stay active there.  I have interacted with Target, Home Depot and many other major brands on Twitter.  Unlike Instagram, when you tag a brand, the response from them on Twitter I find is quicker and more engaging. 

 

  • Best Social Media Platform for your personal life

I probably would of had a twitter account if I did not have a business.  It is a good platform to share current events, discussions and have a more close and personal interaction with the brands you appreciate the most.

 

LinkedIn

  • Best Social Media Platform for your business

I have to be honest. I completely underestimated LinkedIn.  I've been in the Corporate world for over a decade and when I started my business I never looked at LinkedIn as a social media platform to use.  While Instagram gives you the most opportunity to reach potential customers, LinkedIn on the other hand connects like minded businesses within your niche.  LinkedIn is the virtual way to attend a business networking event in my opinion.

 

  • Worse Social Media Platform for your personal life

LinkedIn is all about business.  I would strongly not recommend to post pictures of you and your friends at a basketball game or any of that sort.  If you are not using it as a business, you are most likely using LinkedIn because you are looking for a job.  So, keep it professional in there.

 

Instagram

  • Best Social Media Platform for your personal life only if....

You use it the right way.  If I was not in business, I probably would of had a private Instagram account and would of been following brands that I like to find out about their new products, special promotions and/or get inspiration.  I would probably not have anyone following me as I would most likely never post. Just like Pinterest you can curate and collect all of your favorite posts into collections. I've created collection with food photo ideas, landscape design ideas and much more.

 

  • Best Social Media Platform for your business

Instagram is the best place for businesses to be.  It is an advertising vehicle and promotional magnet.  Because of the strong visual/photos, businesses can grow their engagements tremendously and turn followers into real customers.  You will find a plethora of articles online discussing the science behind Instagram best social media marketing strategies, from using the right hashtags to boosting your engagement.

 

Kaderique Digital Content Creator

Create a social media platform that integrates who you are and what your intentions are.  If you are a business, create a Facebook Fan Page and create a Business Instagram account.  If you are in it for total entertainment and connecting with amazing communities by all means engage and share your personal likings with friends and family.  Otherwise, avoid social media all together if you are not sure how to manage how to use it and separate personal vs business activities.

 

Are you a lifestyle fashion, travel, fitness or food blogger? A photographer, inspiring Artist or Social influencer? Leave the Instagram engagement boost up to me and worry about pushing more content.  Get busy elevating your brand while I take care of your Instagram engagement and direct truly organic likes and genuine comments to boost up your visibility to potential brands and customers.  

For My Business Readers: 

The Old Has Gone, The New is Here- 2 Corinthians 5:17

Another year has gone by guys can you believe it? I honestly can't.

It's funny how I remember when I was a child thinking that adults were crazy when they said time flies. I just didn't get it. Now I truly do. 

Where ever you are in your life right now, this is the rebirth time. This is the time everyone sets goals and resolutions. But let's be honest here, how many of us do actually go back mid year to check our progress? 

Life just has a way of turning itself around that no one can really predict what the future will bring us. All you can do is continue to be the best that you can in all that you do.

Remove everything that is you feel is toxic.

I know it's hard to do especially with social media and all that is on TV. BUT you can control that. If it makes you feel a certain type of way when you scroll down your feed...UNFRIEND...UNFOLLOW or just DELETE YOUR ACCOUNT. Like and follow accounts that fulfill you not destroy you.  I did and it feels AMAZING.

Count your blessings. 

Listen. No one is perfect. What you have that you think bothers you is what someone else wants. Everyday be thankful and grateful for what you have because in less than a split second it could all be gone. I have been through this in my lifetime.  Lost many that were close to me. It is hard to accept I know. But you have to move on, look around and say THANK YOU!

Stop comparing yourself to others

Trust me I know you do. I've done it but decided to stop.  My life is my own. It's evolving at the rate that it is because it's mine. Own yours. Be accountable for it. Why should you idolize anyone else but yourself? What good will that do to you? You are unique.  People will come and go in your life but the ones that are loyal will remain.

Everyday should be a fresh start. Not just because it is a new year.  Everyday when you take a fresh breath of air, remember all that you have.  My father used to tell me: "There are no problems that exist. There are solutions to problems". Put your God first. Whatever your religion beliefs are, praise it.  The Universe is greater than us. 

I wish you lots of health, success, love, security, support, loyal friends and eyes to open your heart.

Thank you for being with me all along and if you are just joining me? Thank you for that. I am truly blessed to know that there is something in me that inspires and sparks certain Je ne sais quoi in your soul.

Thanks Loves!

 

 

 

 

Do You Like this Country?

In 2016, Lifestyle Blogger and owner of Kaderique went to cast her vote.  In this blog, she expresses why it was important as a citizen that day to practice their right to vote. Standing by the United States of America Flag and wearing her red blazer and complementary scarf, this complete outfit was truly a patriotic fashion stop.

Read More

How to Win in 2016?

These women have the drive, the passion, the skills and everything in between when it comes to being an entrepreneur.  

It was an intimate event. We were like best friends chatting about the challenges, wins, failures of running a business and of course we talked about our hair!  It was uplifting, impressive and most importantly it was comforting to be amongst a crowd like this one.

Keisha Reeves - Founder of Keirenae Hair and Skin

Keisha Reeves is the Founder of Keirenae Organic skin and hair care line. Each of her products contain simple ingredients that can be used on both hair and skin. Keisha is continuously evolving her brand.  From showcasing her products at the recent International Hair show to hosting this amazing event all at the same time, Keisha definitely is on track to win in 2016.

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Keisha Reeves - Founder of Keirenae Hair and Skin

 

With Hair, Fashion, Beauty Queen Janae nae2curly

nae2curly Janae - Detroit Hair Vlogger and Social Media Influencer

Janae shared that one of the most important ways to win when you are in business is to truly be you and to love what you do.  I could not agree more.  When Janae speaks, she speaks from her heart.  She is honest and humble.  I had the greatest pleasure to chat with her in person and she recharged my batteries for sure with great business advice.

With Spencer St Fleur Wellness Coach |Nutrition |NaturalHair |Blogger |Brand Influencer |CrossFit

Spencer St Fleur Wellness Coach |Nutrition |NaturalHair |Blogger |Brand Influencer |CrossFit

Spencer St Fleur is the prime example that one can pursue anything that their hearts desire.  She is a Wellness Coach, a Blogger, a Cross Fit Trainer...yes all of this and more! She has energy that you cannot ignore when you meet her.  Spencer believes in one's Purpose and shared with the group that you have to have a WHY because that is what will keep you going as you evolve in whatever journey you are in.

With Creator of napturaldivas2adore

 

Creator of napturaldivas2adore

You know that quote that says She believed She Could, So She Did...Well napturaldivas2adore showcased this at the event.  She mentioned that with the love of God, determination and belief, anyone can win in what they truly love.  She never thought in a million years that her hair would take her this far.  But she believed, she trusted God and went for it! napturaldivas2adore is winning! 

This event was really great. I met new faces and familiar ones too.  Chrisie owns a plus size online boutique.  Her assortment is trendy, fashionable and very well priced. Check out her website http://chrisiestyles.com

With Chrisie Founder/Owner of Chrisie Styles Boutique

Social Media Behavior = Social Media Personality Which one are you?

ok so I've always been on social media, but since I started blogging and selling my handmade jewelry Kaderique, I've discovered that there are social behaviors that determine personalities. 

1. The Lurker - This is the one that is a very consistent visitor. You can tell that he/she logs on during the bus ride to work, during lunch or late night before heading to bed. To me, this is a loyal fan. Their purpose is pure entertainment. I find the lurker very private and conservative.

2. The Clicker - OMG this one brings me smiles everytime they show up. From time to time, especially on Instagram more than other platforms, this is the one that shows up and like literally 15 posts in a row, do not comment and just bounce!

3. The Looker - They are on all social media platforms at least from what I can experience. These are the ones that like your Facebook page, follow on twitter, Google+ ...but NEVER like, NEVER comment and NEVER share. It's like they are there but just not showing up.

4. The Loner - I think everyone has this social media personality. I mean, that is what social media is all about after all. Each publication is expected to inspire and turn on a spark, thought in your mind.

I don't think I've captured them all...But these are at least the consistent ones I have seen to date. Beware of your social media behavior!




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